082 – Andrea Isabelle Lucas: Owning Your Life Story

Sarah Tacy [00:00:05]:
Hello. Welcome. I’m Sara Tacy, and this is Threshold Moments, a podcast where guests and I share stories about the process of updating into truer versions of ourselves. The path is unknown and the pull feels real. Together, we share our grief, laughter, love, and lifesaving tools. Join us. Hello, and welcome to Threshold Moments. Today, we have with us Andrea Isabelle Lucas.

Sarah Tacy [00:00:44]:
And you will hear in the intro I do when I’m with her all about her career and how impressive she is. And you will get a feel for her beginnings. Maybe I would mention, so I read her book or listened to her book, Own It All. And hearing that the beginnings were hard and that at 14, she ran away at 19, becoming a teen mom and really taking her life into her own hands multiple times throughout her life and having one big point that really, really opened up her eyes to wanting to make even better decisions. And the way that I see it, the way that I read the book was that so many times she made the best decisions, for the situation she was in and for the resources she And to me, it is so inspiring to see how making the next best step for yourself over and over and over again. And of course, we can falter. And of course, we can take a left turn, but redirecting ourselves onto that path over and over and over again, what a beautiful life we can end up living. And her life is filled with abundance and incredible friends and beautiful kids and strong relationships and a really, really successful business.

Sarah Tacy [00:02:15]:
So without further ado, I present to you Andrea Isabel Lucas. Hello, and welcome to Threshold Moments. Today, we have with us Andrea Isabel Lucas. Andrea is an entrepreneur, a keynote speaker, author, feminist, and life and business coach who is devoted to helping women stand up for themselves and take radical responsibility for their own happiness. Andrea became a single mom as a teen and rebuilt her life after surviving domestic violence to found the multimillion dollar Barre and Soul, a collection of boutique barre and yoga studios, and the Barre and Soul Academy Instructor Training Program. As a speaker, she has addressed audiences across the United States and shared stages with Michelle Obama and Billie Jean King. I always feel like that needs a long pause just to let that let that soak in. She is the author of the book, Own It All and has been featured by the BBC, Forbes, Entrepreneur, Women’s Health, The Huffington Post, and Boston Magazine among others.

Sarah Tacy [00:03:44]:
So this conversation came about and that Andrea and I have been in similar circles for a while. We end up at pool parties together most recently and often amongst groups of entrepreneurial women. And I have never really gotten to know you. And you put up a post a month or 2 ago that really piqued my interest that like, wow, this woman has a life that has been so fully lived and who has walked through multiple thresholds. And I wonder if she would be so generous to share with us. And you said yes. And then it was like, by the way, I have this book. And I downloaded it on Audible, and it’s so good.

Andrea [00:04:42]:
Thank you.

Sarah Tacy [00:04:43]:
And so I feel like our conversation today will give a glimpse into you and your story, but also your book because I think your book most likely really reflects so much of what you believe in and what your life journey has looked like. When I finished it, I had that feeling like, oh, this is a really great book to recommend to any of my friends. There are so many key parts in it from the overall idea of owning your life to forgiveness, relationships, clarity and communication, business style, like, it really hit on all parts. And social justice. So to have that as one of your biggest, I I wanna say, like, purposes in life, driving forces. I think the word that you were using was legacy. Really has the book written in such a mindful way. So that’s my little I don’t wanna say my plug for your book, but my appreciation as I just was able to listen through the whole the whole thing.

Andrea [00:06:02]:
Oh my goodness. Thank you so much for the acknowledgment and the appreciation, and it just it makes me feel good to know that it landed so much with you. And you’re right. Like, we’ve been at a lot of the same events, and we haven’t had a chance to really get to know each other very well yet. And I’m just so excited to continue to get to know you, and I’m really grateful and touched that you took the time to get to know me so well. And to read the book, it it it’s so intimate, so vulnerable. Probably, you can relate to this with having a podcast. I know you had a very successful career as a yoga teacher, and it’s like in the moment, there’s live feedback and you know exactly how it’s impacting the people in the room.

Andrea [00:06:41]:
And, actually, I mean, there’s lots of other ways it probably is too, but you can perceive and get that that live feedback. It’s just like if you were in a band playing a live show versus putting out an album. It’s like that with putting out a podcast or a book. You’re like, holy crap. I just laid my soul there, and it’s just out there now. And I’m like, is anyone even reading it? Like, does anybody even know about it? Does anybody like this? You know? So it’s just so affirming to have that feedback. So thank you.

Sarah Tacy [00:07:12]:
I read Linda Sivertson’s book that she released, I think, 2 years ago. Maybe it was Beautiful Writers. And I reached out just to tell her how moved I was. And there is something for me. There’s clearly a way that I love self help books to be written, which is to have story involved. I’m just thinking also the book Into the Magic Shop. Again, it was like somebody who overcame such incredible adversity and learned such incredible lessons along the way. And when I reached out and shared with her the parts that were so moving to me and was kind of specific about things I love, her response was so similar, which was, it’s so helpful to hear back because you may see the numbers that people have bought books and numbers become numbers, but until you get to hear back from people.

Sarah Tacy [00:08:13]:
And every now and then, I’ll you know, somebody will reach out and tell me how a podcast has moved them or what they’ve liked. But by and large, it’s more I see numbers, but I don’t it’s not the same as teaching a yoga yoga class where you are in the vibe with everybody and you’re really feeling what the feels in the room. So, yeah, I hear you. And I also laughed when Linda was in your book. I was like, oh, there we go. Full circle.

Andrea [00:08:36]:
But it’s true. Like, there could be dozens or more of people that have sent a podcast episode of yours to 10 of their friends or to just their inner circle in a way that has, like, changed the narrative for them and rippled out. And, like, most of the time, they’re not gonna be like, PS, just FYI, Sarah. Let me shoot you a quick deal. I’ve been telling everyone about your podcast episode. Like, most people just won’t, and and that’s okay. And it does feel so good when when people do reach out.

Sarah Tacy [00:09:03]:
Yeah. When you sent me your book, like, the link so I could easily find it, and and it went for the audio because I was gonna be on a long boat journey up the coast, so that was gonna be the easiest one. It’s not gonna you know, I’d get, like, sick if I was bouncing up and down

Andrea [00:09:19]:
and trying to read.

Sarah Tacy [00:09:22]:
You gave me a warning that the opening scene might be a lot. Mhmm. And so for listeners, the opening scene includes domestic violence. And when I was thinking about where we might start, it’s not unlike me to go, like, let’s go back to conception. And then I thought, you know, Andrea has probably thought through this pretty well. And in her book, she most likely started at this point for a very good reason. And for me, the the clarity is what a huge threshold moment this was. And I’m wondering if you feel open.

Sarah Tacy [00:10:04]:
And as you said, there are a lot of tender, vulnerable parts in your book. And so when I ask you a question, if there’s anything where, like, I don’t wanna talk about this or this doesn’t feel good now, there’s no need to speak on anything that doesn’t feel in the best alignment for you in this moment, which you I’m sure you know.

Andrea [00:10:22]:
Thank you. I am feeling really tender today just for a variety of reasons, so we’ll see. So, yeah, I did choose to start with that scene because, honestly, you know, having been a teen mom, having left the house and supported myself working in strip clubs, you know, that was the only way that I could really go out on my own that that I could see at the time and be able to provide for myself and my child. Like, these things are not things most people would probably guess if they met me now. And I think, statistically, I later learned that I shouldn’t be as successful as I have been. Luckily, I did not get the memo at the time, so I just kept assuming that I was supposed to do big things and have a big life. And I didn’t, you know, probably there was a certain amount of privilege that played into me not getting those messages that I think are out there about what we’re supposed to be capable of. But, yeah, I just assumed I was gonna do big things in my life, and I anytime there was an obstacle, I just found a way and, you know, made my way around it.

Andrea [00:11:30]:
So I really wanted to make sure. And even sometimes when I’ll be introducing myself on a panel or I’ll just feel called to say that I’m a domestic violence survivor because in any given room, you know, with a 100 people in it, somebody in there has shame around their story, and they are feeling like a total loser. Like, nobody else has these problems. I’m damaged, or I can’t let people know this about me because other people have their shit together and I am a mess or what have you. So I did work for the ghostwriter on my book. I really like to share that because nobody talks about that, and I don’t wanna contribute to I don’t want people to take own it all, and here that means do it all. So, like, it involved getting help to be able to write a book in addition to running my business and everything. And it was a great process.

Andrea [00:12:27]:
And, you know, I wasn’t trying to win a literary award. So I don’t feel that there’s any problem with letting someone help you even figure out how the hell does one outline a book and, you know, where do you start and where do you finish and, you know, whatever. So that was fantastic. But she’d send me a draft and then I’d say, like, this isn’t quite it or, yeah, we’re on the right track, but I don’t really I would never say this thing or whatever. And then after that was done, I edited it 4 times and then decided, okay, time to move. It’s time to get it out there. But all that to say that when she first sent me the first draft, she started with the after where there’s this beautiful scene of me walking into my beautiful studio and how awesome my life is, and it I was just like, if I was the reader, I almost wouldn’t like this person. They sound way too polished.

Andrea [00:13:16]:
They’ve got got it all together, and I’m not resonating with this at all. And I was like, no. I think we need to write away show and hook the reader with, like, rooting for me from the rock bottom moment. And then let’s celebrate later and not try to go the other way around about it. So it nowadays, writing a book, another thing that’s so vulnerable about it is that you don’t get to change it after. There’s a lot I would change now, like, post pandemic, post whatever. So many different ways that we say things now with the way we gender things or what have you that I’d like to be able to go back and change. But one of the things, most cringey vulnerable things is just knowing that, really, it should have a trigger warning for how that opening scene is.

Andrea [00:13:59]:
But, yes, it does start with domestic violence, and and that certainly with a threshold moment because while I knew I wasn’t in a healthy relationship, and I had mentally resigned myself to, I guess, choosing convenience over happiness or something. You know, I was going to I was planning on sticking it out, honestly, and didn’t really dare to hope for more. And I don’t mean to say that in a shameful way either because usually takes extreme discomfort for people to make a life change. And, certainly, I felt forced into leaving that relationship, and I’m actually been grateful ever since because I might have stayed and I’m glad I didn’t. But while the actual episode of violence that it was the first time that had happened, although then I could easily see the red flags looking backwards from there to not be that surprised that it it happened. But the real threshold moment was when my neighbor had actually rushed me to the emergency room. And I called home to tell my family about it. And my dad’s response with, like, such sadness and resignation was, what are you gonna do? You can’t leave.

Andrea [00:15:22]:
So that really was the threshold moment because it was when I realized like, oh, no one’s gonna fix this for me.

Sarah Tacy [00:15:31]:
I saw some micro moments before that in your story. Yeah. And, you know, I don’t need to go into too much detail, but there was the moment of absolute survival of the way that one might curl up to, like, recognizing of mobilizing yourself and reaching out to nearest communities. So there are, like, all these steps of, like, really incredible health that I saw in the process before you even got to the hospital. Mhmm. And, like, courage and valor and decision that you wanted to live and make it. And Yeah. And once you’re there, that somebody who does end up later in the story giving you some aid, but at that point, doesn’t know that there’s another way for you in that moment to so clearly go like, oh, I am going to own my life from this point forward.

Sarah Tacy [00:16:35]:
Mhmm. And although, as you said, there are many people who experience this and don’t speak about it out loud, there are as many, if not more, who give away their power for convenience on a daily basis. And so I can think about times in my marriage and my relationship when I’m just absolutely exhausted and not sleeping for years. And the day where I looked in the mirror and was like, who is this person? And then looking back and going, oh, here are all the times where I just went along with it. And it’s like that looking around, so looking around, like, my house and looking around all the things that look so good, and that people would say, you’re so lucky. Don’t change anything. To then go like, wait. But this there is, like, the I did choose this, but mostly out of exhaustion and confusion.

Sarah Tacy [00:17:36]:
And so at any point, I was thinking so as I was listening to your book, I was listening to it while we were driving through hours of fog. Every day, we were driving through hours of fog, which is a bit dangerous. And really, you have to be quite alert. And so you’re using radar and GPS, and it’s telling you the direction to get there, like 287 degrees. And then there might be a buoy or there might be a red dot that you don’t know what it is before you are in your and so you just see that there over and over again, you go off course and come back onto course and off course and back onto course. And if you were to stay off course for a prolonged period of time, just how far off course you could get to. And and those might be like a rock bottom. Oh, shit.

Sarah Tacy [00:18:25]:
I’m in the middle of the ocean. I’m like but there are so many micro moments along the way often before those those big. And it’s so similar, I think, to how you spoke about goals near the end of the book of, like, there’s that big sexy goal, but there are a 1,000 unsexy goals along the way. And I in this moment, I’m just thinking of the permission to like how many times we may have to course correct as just like a constant practice. And I think when you give such a big example at the beginning of your book, I don’t think it’s lost on the reader of where and how so many of us have similar roles, and we never know. Like you said, that was a that was a first instance of the physical act, but we never know how that’s gonna be. And in the end, it’s just that resolute determination of I’m going to own my life. And I feel like before in so many ways too, as you said, as teenage mom saying like, I don’t feel safe in this house, so I’m gonna do this thing to create more safety for my child and myself.

Sarah Tacy [00:19:40]:
And in my mind, you had that before too.

Andrea [00:19:43]:
Thank you for that. And, actually, I really appreciate how you’re able to pick up on each of those, like you said, kinda micro moments or the other examples. No one else has ever mentioned that before. So thank you.

Sarah Tacy [00:20:01]:
Can you tell me so you’re saying this book came out before the pandemic. What year was it?

Andrea [00:20:06]:
It was 2019. Yes. And it was March.

Sarah Tacy [00:20:11]:
Oh, wow.

Andrea [00:20:12]:
Yeah. So I feel like a pretty decent person by now, but sometimes I have to remind myself, like, my social media these days, I mostly pull quotes from my book and just match it with, like, current photos, and that’s the way that I’m able to honestly keep up at the moment with having a presence on social. But it’s hilarious because there are days that the quote that I see is, like, the thing I needed to hear that day. And it’s just that whole, like, teaching what you need to learn. Yeah. I’m still actively learning these lessons. And, yeah, man, I guess, I really want to acknowledge myself for how much I probably have grown and been through having getting the business through the pandemic and being a leader at a time when there was absolutely no way to not be under fire from somebody. Right? Like, there was just no popular decisions that anybody could make that was, you know, not gonna piss somebody off.

Andrea [00:21:17]:
And that was a huge I mean, I would say that’s my next my next book when I when I finish having the breakthrough. But maybe my next book will really be about, I’m gonna say boundaries, what Terry Cole calls, like, the high functioning codependency where you’re overachieving to your own detriment, because I think that’s been the the biggest lesson is, like, one of the tools that I used to to overcome obstacles was just to work harder, push myself, like, take responsibility. I’m still a huge fan of taking responsibility. And I know I spoke about delegation in the book, and I think that’s, like, the school that I’m in right now for sure is, you know, that upper limit is like, okay. But how do I really say no to more things, delegate more things, trust others, and let myself be supported in more ways, and stand in my truth even when it pisses some people off. Man, the pandemic, if nothing else, that was for sure the the school that it was for me. Because all you could do every day is make the best decision you had with your values and the information that you were working with, and it was guaranteed unpopular with somebody. You know?

Sarah Tacy [00:22:26]:
Right. Yeah. And so we’re talking, I imagine, both with a studio being open or not open vaccines or not vaccines, the social justice movement that really got amplified that had a lot of different opinions. And if you are somebody who is a public figure in any way, who is whose job seemingly now becomes that you would be responsive to all of these topics and themes that, a lot of people were feeling life threatened by it. And I think it’s a bit analogous to if you’re driving in a car and you accidentally cut somebody off and they give you the finger and they start honking and they’re so mad, and it felt so innocent, but they’re having a response of you almost killed me. Mhmm. Right? Like, it’s like like, I without even knowing, right, it could be like and, you know, some people may have, like, calmer nervous systems and and be like, oh, great. I responded.

Sarah Tacy [00:23:32]:
We’re good. But I think with everything that went on 2019, 2020, and and really moving forward. There’s so much of feeling like our lives are at risk by other people’s opinions being different than ours.

Andrea [00:23:47]:
You really summarized that so succinctly and so well. I wish I could just put it in, like, a a frame and hang it up because it’s so perfectly set. I’m like, oh my god. You just expressed everything that I I went through. And, yeah, it sucked. It really sucked. And so glad that we’re where we are now, which I I think is better than where we were. We’re all it’s all a work in progress, but I I do think a lot of people have realized how tenable that way of relating actually is.

Sarah Tacy [00:24:32]:
Yeah. Yeah. I’ve heard that from a few of my guests who have, you know, social media platforms. And I’m thinking of Jen Hunter Marshall who has a gym. And just that was a big part of what she was sharing with how challenging it is to be vulnerable and put yourself out and to have people who are not in the arena really slamming. If we were to say a little bit about when I think about barre and soul, I think some lessons that are really useful for the listener is the idea of small doable pieces. And the way that you put it in your book was what is the biggest challenge you can take today? So I think they’re actually the same thing. One sounds more like really challenging you to the edge, and the other one might be for someone who’s like, okay.

Andrea [00:25:23]:
I can take one small bit, but it’s

Sarah Tacy [00:25:26]:
I think it’s the same thing. And I’m wondering if you could tell us a little bit about your journey into bar and soul and the idea of the small doable pieces or the biggest challenge you can do for the day.

Andrea [00:25:43]:
Yeah. It’s funny. When I wrote the book, what came up the phrase that came out of me and landed on the page was take the biggest risk you can stomach for today. Hilarious because stomach felt an important word at the time even though I didn’t have nearly the level of somatic awareness that I have now. But I’m really even much more clearer now of that. It really is about what your nervous system can handle. And I do think that when we get overwhelmed, it’s very easy to get overwhelmed by a goal or did not believe that it’s possible. I think, yeah, our bodies can’t even muster an action, really.

Andrea [00:26:29]:
And so it’s so important to just break it down down down down down to the baby baby step. And it’s funny because during the pandemic, I didn’t feel like that phrase was resonating at all because taking the biggest risk you can stomach, nobody wants to take a risk. We were all like, this life is too big a risk right now. But it was more like, take the step that you can stomach for today or do the thing, you know, the action. Absolutely. I didn’t even like, it’s funny because, of course, as everybody does, we always move the, you know, goal post on our goals and our dreams, and there’s always more different, bigger, better things, or at least for somebody like me who’s very ambitious. But so, of course, I look at the business I have today, and I’m like, oh, but I wanted to be so much bigger, and I wanna do so many more things. But at the same time, I I have to if I’m really being honest, like, the the size business that I have today, the fact that Bar and Soul could generate 1,000,000 of dollars in revenue in a year, like, the fact that, you know, I have multiple physical locations in 3 different states and over 70 employees, and that is not remotely the vision.

Andrea [00:27:35]:
The fact that I would ever share a stage with Michelle Obama, that was not on my list of things that I even wished for or thought that I could do. It was really just, like, the next the next thing that gave me butterflies that I felt like, okay. I could do that. I think I could do that. You know? And each time I did that thing, another new doors would open that I didn’t even plan on. So I just think it’s so important to do something and to always be taking those actions and those baby steps. Even if that thing is just saying out loud, hey, I’ve been thinking about whatever, you know, doing public speaking. I’ve been thinking about starting a business.

Andrea [00:28:15]:
I’ve been whatever. I think just that action alone is an action because speaking opens doors. It creates possibilities within your network. It lets people know what you’re looking to attract and then they could bring it to you. So I really just think wherever you are, there’s some next step that you can take. And and I tried to write the book from that perspective where if you are someone who is actually at rock bottom, this book will help you. If you’re someone that luckily isn’t at rock bottom, it’ll help you because wherever you are, honestly, it really does come down to to baby steps. And those are some of the messages I try to weave throughout the book, including, like, in the own your health chapter.

Andrea [00:28:55]:
It’s like, just have a bare minimum just have a bare minimum standard and literally actually make it, you know, such a low bar that you could trip over it. And then when that’s not requiring effort, do the thing that takes just a teeny bit more effort because I do think we over do it with our goals and our plans sometimes, and then we’re just not even motivated to take the first action.

Sarah Tacy [00:29:18]:
Yeah. Yeah. In your book, you share that, you know, I think it may have started by taking a teacher training. And, like, then how scary it is just to to do your 1st class and then making your way. And then I think it’s like Equinox and then becoming manager of Equinox and then like Oh, and exhale. Yep. Exhale. Exhale.

Sarah Tacy [00:29:36]:
Thank you. Exhale. I thought I had that wrong. And exhale. And then, yeah, recognizing, oh, I have a really unique style that I wanna integrate, and it wants to be more soulful, and it wants to weave purpose into the each movement. And these little ways that doors open for us like, oh, here’s I don’t feel like I could put a down payment on a studio right now, but I could teach this method here, here, and here, and then a studio opens. But, you know, like it’s just these little things. And right now I’m thinking of the Lost Kitchen where I think when Aaron French was just like, I don’t know.

Sarah Tacy [00:30:13]:
There’s not a place. Someone’s like, you could use our barn that has, you know and it’s now this place that’s on TV. You can’t get a reservation at, but it was all small steps. It’s not like I wanna be on HBO. It was like what lights me up next, what brings butterflies. And I’m thinking of also when I used to teach teacher trainings and I would, like the night before going to a new studio where I have no idea how they’re going to receive me or my style. And I’m thinking of how my eyes would start to water. It’s kind of that feeling right before you’re about to cry.

Sarah Tacy [00:30:47]:
And I’d have the butterflies in my stomach. And sometimes I’d ask my husband, like, will you just hold me? And there are times where he’s like, why do you do this? And I’m like, I actually, this is a sign I’m on the right path. It’s like, I’m doing it because I’m called and the little butterflies and that, like, about to cry is, is just the part right before breakthrough of the next step. And I loved seeing the progression of your business. And I wanna say one more thing, which is I just did a 5 point sequence series on Threshold Moments. It’s the beginning of July, the 1st 3 weeks of July, and it goes through my Scotland trip. And the first episode is on preparation. And I talk about the unknown preparation that happens when you are just living life and course correcting and taking the next right step and asking questions, the universe that you said like you’d say out loud what you think you wanna do.

Sarah Tacy [00:31:51]:
For me, sometimes it’s just like, oh, in that moment, I was like, I don’t even know what brings me alive. Like, show me. And, like, in kind of letting it go and the unknown preparation where it’s not so much like, okay. Now I need to get QuickBooks. Now I need to find a studio space because that’s important too. I just really love, like, that surprise and delight me when we do just take that next right step.

Andrea [00:32:19]:
I think so. I think we maybe put a little too much pressure. Like, if we have to completely rack our brains to come up with the next step, that’s that’s not the next step. Like Yeah. There’s something that’s available right now that is like, oh, that makes me a little nervous, but excited. Like, that’s the thing. That is it. And thank you for reminding me of your original question, which was about, like, the the progression of the steps.

Andrea [00:32:47]:
You’re right. Like, when I first started teaching bar first of all, when I took my first class was, like, who even am I to do this? I’m not an athletic person. I’m, like I was pregnant at the time, and and then when in my teacher training, I was going through piecing my life back together. So I was super not confident, and I felt like I was getting up in front of all these women that I thought had it all together. And I was kind of a mess, and I felt like such an imposter. And just practicing alone in a room was, like, forcing my voice to come out of my body because I I was so shut down around it. So the fact of even just being able to get up and teach in front of people was a massive accomplishment at that time. And there was no part of me that was like, I’m gonna own a multimillion dollar bar empire.

Andrea [00:33:34]:
Like, for sure, no. Definitely not. In fact, I wouldn’t have even told you I wanted that. I wanted to be like a women’s studies professor at the time. But it was like, you said, the little break throughs, you know. And then after a while, I was like, wait. I’m in such a flow state here, and what a great platform for someone who wants to have an impact on women’s lives and be a force of a conduit of empowerment in the world for women. So, yeah, each thing was a bit of a surprise and delight as it came, and it was like, oh, I could do this? Okay.

Andrea [00:34:04]:
Scary, but exciting. It was kinda like that.

Sarah Tacy [00:34:08]:
I thought I was gonna be I was a psychology major and I thought that was my path. And when I got into yoga out of my own threshold of immense pain and back injury and kind of loss of identity moment, there was one teacher that I eventually ended up with and somebody said, Oh, that’s like spiritual boot camp. And I go in and she’d have you hold poses for a very long time and then yell things like, why are you doing this? Are you doing this out of love, or are you doing this to prove something to somebody? And I’d over and over go like, oh, shoot. I just don’t wanna look weak next to this person. Yeah. And it was so helpful. I called it applied psychology, which I actually know that there is a field called applied psychology, so it’s not equal.

Andrea [00:34:54]:
They’re not the same thing.

Sarah Tacy [00:34:56]:
That version is not the same as the official version. Because in the moment, if somebody is asking me to reflect on something while I’m living the challenged state and I can change it in the challenge, then it’s easier for me to next go out on the lacrosse field where I would have performance anxiety and beat myself up if I missed a goal. And remember, why am I doing this? Am I doing this to prove something to somebody? Or am I doing this out of the love and the joy of playing? And everything shifted for me. And I remember saying to my professor, I don’t think that I can sit on a couch next to somebody and have them just speak without their body being included. And so much of what I learned working with athletes, this might be interesting to you doing bar and soul and incorporating philosophy as you teach is if they could receive feedback within 15 seconds of the movement, they’re more likely to be able to update the programming. And also that you can’t learn too much in a state of fatigue. And so that idea of going hard and recovery and going hard and recovery, but getting feedback in the moment of challenge and like the mental not just the physical, but the mental ability to fix myself when, generally, I would be looping and nobody would be there to throw a new idea of how I could manage the situation. It was so powerful to have that mind, body.

Sarah Tacy [00:36:31]:
And so for me, in in those moments in those classes, I was like, oh, I can’t just go get a PhD in this area. I have to include the body. So I went immediately into yoga teacher training upon graduation. It It was like a hard left turn from where I thought academics were gonna take me.

Andrea [00:36:51]:
Yeah. Absolutely. And it makes sense. I mean, you felt it in your body and you knew. And that’s it. I mean, and it’s funny because I’ve been on a quite interesting journey because I think it’s almost like, do you like the war of art? Is that a book that you

Sarah Tacy [00:37:06]:
I haven’t read it in a long time, but I have read it, and I remember really loving it.

Andrea [00:37:09]:
Yeah. Resistance? Resistance. And the more something is your dream, the more you resist it and procrastinate around it and whatever. And I think because I didn’t mean to start a fitness business, I actually was able to just go for it a lot more at the beginning because I just had less attachment and anxiety about the whole thing. It was just like, This is working. I don’t know. I’m gonna keep doing this. Like, holy crap.

Andrea [00:37:37]:
That thing worked too. Let me do the next thing. You know? And it is very interesting. And then I went through a period, in all honesty, of being like, how did I get here? Why am I kinda what you said about, like, wait. I did choose this, but also what am I doing here? How did I end up I I did not set out to be a fitness instructor. I didn’t really resonate with that identity. I thought I was supposed to be something else. I kept trying to go be a public speaker or an author or a coach because I’ll that more matched how I saw myself.

Andrea [00:38:08]:
And something has happened in the last few years where I’ve been able to integrate it all back together again, and now I’m beyond committed to the physical movement part. I can never just talk to people’s heads. I couldn’t ever be totally fulfilled with that. And, yeah, and it comes from just having these embodied experiences and just knowing that it it takes your whole system, it takes your whole body for your mind, your spirit, your soul, whatever you wanna call it, to really receive transformation or achieve transformation.

Sarah Tacy [00:38:45]:
It’s funny now that I don’t teach sequence. I would, but I don’t. It’s not a strong calling and that so much of mine is on the computer sitting across from somebody that, like, I could never sit on couch, but kinda I am. And the difference being that we are constantly checking in, like, where is that in the body? Is there a movement that has to happen? And I will say that when I was getting back a little bit, just like the tiniest bit of sleep again, I started going to see a friend who was a fitness instructor once a week and maybe it moved up to twice a week. And as soon as I lifted that one day, like, that first time that I lifted weights again, I was like, oh. This is like, oh. Like, the thing that happens when our muscles feel strong is that our emotions begin to get some tone, and our courage begins to get some tone. And I always felt with yoga, the stretching aspect often had to do with giving space and flexibility in our perspective and our perception, but that they were both really important, both at strength and mobility.

Sarah Tacy [00:40:00]:
So I just I really love it when when people integrate the 2 simultaneously. I just think it’s so powerful.

Andrea [00:40:08]:
It is so powerful. And and I know we’ve talked about this before how you do reach a point. You can reach a point. I have reached a point, and I think you might have also reached that point in career as a movement teacher where you do get kinda sick of calling out poses, and you wanna go deeper. And it’s like, I don’t have time to say everything and discuss everything with you that I really need and want to do if I have to keep telling you where to put your knee and your ankle and your toe and your hand. So it’s like, okay. I’ve done this for a while, and I need that that new expression or that next expression. And I very much been in a felt that I was in, like, a limbo state for a little while.

Andrea [00:40:49]:
Because I’m like, I don’t really wanna go back to teaching classes, but something’s missing and I do need a vehicle and an outlet. And I very reluctantly picked up a couple of classes on the schedule. And there’s just, like, a variety of reasons why I didn’t wanna do that. Number 1, I think in the past burning myself out from doing way too much of it and fearing that like, having that negative association. I think trying to be the CEO of a business that was growing or grew to a point that it didn’t feel sustainable to have that extra recurring thing on my calendar. Yeah. Feeling, like, kinda bored. Like, no.

Andrea [00:41:29]:
I I don’t wanna talk about fitness anymore. I wanna get into deeper stuff with people. I wanna coach people and and do all of that. But it’s funny because someone who I really respect said to me, like, well, I don’t know. But when I’m not teaching, I get dysregulated, and you may just wanna try it again just to see it. And I still resisted it for 6 more months. And then there was just a turnover issue in one of the studios. And, really, I didn’t wanna let the members down and have to cancel these classes, so I picked up these two classes.

Andrea [00:41:56]:
And right away, it was the best 2 hours of my week. And I know. And I’m like, oh my god. People being in a room with people and moving together and, you know, that mentor had said to me, like, having an outlet, having a place to express and to channel and to share was so good. And it did get kind of unsustainable for my schedule. So now I’m like, okay. What’s the sweet spot gonna be? Is it gonna be like doing pop up classes or doing special workshops where there is more time for the talking part? Because I freaking love talking, and and I just think there’s so much to talk about. So it it’s cool to see where the journey is gonna go, and and I feel the same way about you.

Andrea [00:42:37]:
Like, it sounds like you’ve found ways to bring movement into a deeper kind of work that you’re doing now.

Sarah Tacy [00:42:44]:
Yeah. And I’m, like, imagining into retreats that I want to host at my house or somewhere else. I’m like, I want more physical movement than just what we do on the screen. Right? Like, I’m like, like, I’m imagining Janine Yoder coming in and doing an embodied dance class, and then also just doing some of the physical things that I love to guide and having a little bit more room for that physicality. And your coaching within your book is so good. Thank you. And it’s so doable and also really useful reflections that I feel like will never be not useful. Like, I don’t know that anyone will ever master a calendar.

Sarah Tacy [00:43:29]:
So to have the reminders and to have the questions to really think about and to both have I imagined, and I read in your bio so it’s true, that you had teacher trainings, and you’ve also built this business. And although I could lead various teacher trainings on things, I’m not sure that I would want to necessarily, say, like, I’ll run a mastermind to teach women how to do business. But I feel like the way that you would lead something like that would be so beautiful because there would be so much of the personal work and the social justice and the legacy and the clarity on who you are on top of knowing how to build the business. So that seems like a good idea.

Andrea [00:44:13]:
You know what? I’m so glad you said that because I actually do have something that it’s gonna be coming up. And it’s funny because during the pandemic, while we were all pivoting and doing different things, you know, and there certainly wasn’t much traffic going through the studios. And I did do a couple little I called them mini masterminds because they were, like, 8 weeks long maybe. And I put together a curriculum and I taught people the business of, frankly, boutique fitness. And even, actually, the way it’s structured, it could be for any fitness professional. And PS, just to, like, complete the last thought about the identity of fitness professional not really vibing. Like, I don’t even think that’s what I am now. So I think that’s why I’ve been able to, like yeah.

Andrea [00:44:58]:
It’s not I’m not a fitness instructor. And movement is huge part, and fitness is a huge part of what I do. So however whatever label you enjoy for someone who helps people move their bodies and stay healthy and support people in their physical being being well so that they can really have their fullest self expression and and be out there getting building their own legacy. You know what I mean? So, anyway, I ran these things and I called them barre boss because most of the people in my audience, you know, have been through my barre training. I have yoga trainings and some other things too. But so I called the barre boss, and I loved it. And it’s available now as, like, an online course. And relaunched it, like, once in the last couple years, and it kinda just was, like, meh.

Andrea [00:45:49]:
And for one thing, I think the name Barabas is a little misleading because it really does teach the whole world of doing fitness as a business, but there’s also a huge personal development piece to it too. And so I was thinking about relaunching it, renaming it. And I’d love to tell you the name, but I don’t know what it is yet. But

Sarah Tacy [00:46:05]:
I was scared

Andrea [00:46:06]:
of the one I don’t yeah. It’s it’s gonna be named at some point. But, anyway, I was supposed to be relaunching the online course of it this summer, and then I pushed it back to this fall just because I had a lot going on. And then I met with my marketing person a couple weeks ago, and I just was like, I’m not excited about launching this at all. Like, I know this content is so good and so necessary for people, but the thought of an online course is just, like, just not light my fire right now. But I was like, but you know what would light my fire is if people got access to the course, but then we had an immersion together. And we all got together and we, like, sweat and we laugh and we cry and we, like, hug and we dance and we, like, shake and we declare things. I’m like, okay.

Andrea [00:46:50]:
That I could totally do, and I could be so excited about. So it’s gonna be that, and I’ll tell you the name when I find out what it is. And if folks just wanna follow along with me, they’ll definitely be hearing about it when I when I start to open that up.

Sarah Tacy [00:47:05]:
So great. I think this episode’s coming out in August or September. So when it does, if you do have a name, we’ll put it in the notes or maybe we’ll throw a little audio in there, but I’m excited for it. And I I wanna say the card I pulled today, which I thought was so interesting, is legacy of light. And I was like, no. Except I get how the world works. I’m not that surprised. I think the closing question will have to do with that, but there is a part of me, it was wondering if it might be too big of a question.

Sarah Tacy [00:47:37]:
So just take what feels good and go with it. I was wondering if I gave you the the cue of khakis in the circus, if you would be able to say a thing or 2 about authenticity to our listeners? Absolutely.

Andrea [00:48:01]:
When I was little, I used to. I had a stage name that I created for myself. So I used to walk into rooms with a hairbrush using it as a microphone, and I would go, ladies and gentlemen, boxy. Wow. And I don’t know, like, where I got that name. But, honestly, like, that is who I am meant to be. You know what I mean? Like, my north node is Leo. Like, I am supposed to be galloping around on a sparkly pony in this world, and it’s hard for me to do that.

Andrea [00:48:37]:
It’s I get really afraid of getting criticized, and I wanna be seen as good. And I you know? So there was a time in my life where I was just in such a wrong, for me, relationship and trying so hard to look good. I was getting married at the time, and I felt that it would just kinda make everybody’s parents happy to do this whole church wedding even though I had really no connection with the religion. And we had to pose for this directory. We had to join a church, and we posed for the directory photo. And I was just wearing all these things that weren’t me, including literally khaki freaking pants. It’s just something I would never actually own. Like, I just try not to even wear shirts with collars.

Andrea [00:49:20]:
Like, it’s just not me. It’s just not you know, there are there’s rare exceptions, but when when I ever got the photo back, I just was like, who is this? You know? Like, who the hell is this person? This is so not who I am. And later after that relationship ended, I had this opportunity to join a circus troupe, and it was the most fun thing that I’ve ever taken part in. And we did burlesque, and we we danced, and we sang, and there was a band, and I got to play the ukulele, and I got to make up weird characters. And I had this bearded lady character, which was so fun because I was getting my women’s studies degree. So I got to get all these, like, interesting gender concepts and kinda play them out and make people laugh. And that was, yeah, one of the most alive experiences that I’ve had. And it’s just like, do you wanna be tripping and grinning and just kind of getting through in the khaki pants, or do you wanna be, like, unhinged and unleashed as your most weird, fun, silly, you know, glorious self.

Andrea [00:50:30]:
And I think there is something to the fact that that little version of me knew that that’s that was my vibe. That’s that’s what I was here to to be and who I was here to be. So it’s a daily practice. That’s for sure. And I think one of the biggest things that I wanna continue to work on and to share with others.

Sarah Tacy [00:50:50]:
The first day that I met you, Kate Northrop was having a cross pollination dinner. It was post COVID or not, like, post COVID. It was, like, one of the first times I was in a social situation, and it was actually at my dad’s old restaurant. So that was also interesting because he had just sold it a year before. And I remember, you know, I was just still climbing out of a cave

Andrea [00:51:18]:
Mhmm.

Sarah Tacy [00:51:19]:
And just feeling like real vulnerable that night and just just really doing my best to say. That’s generally my goal whenever I go into social situations is I just wanna stay in my body. It’s like my only goal, which is probably why even though we’ve been at places multiple times, we haven’t spoken yet because it’s like, I might talk to, like, one new person or just like, I just wanna be in my body. It’s my only goal in life. Like but I do remember that night you had a black and white 1 piece jumpsuit on. It was like a beautiful, like, deep cut, and you look so sexy. And so I love as you talk about your style and what makes you feel like you. That the times I’ve seen you, I feel like you are always authentically, like, in your power, in your sexiness, in your strength.

Sarah Tacy [00:52:10]:
And I’m thinking of one other thing, which is this man I met, Boyd Varty, who is a lion tracker and a shaman and a life coach. And he speaks about the idea of the path of not here. So as you’re tracking an animal and you lose the track, that it’s still really good information. It’s the track of not here. And so those times that we like that, you know, in this situation, you look at the picture and you’re like, who is that? Just as good of information as when you are so lit up as a bearded woman playing the ukulele in a circus of feeling like the path of not here and the path of, like, hell yes. And then all of the places in between, how we are just constantly getting information back, this idea that we really can’t fail. That’s one thing that I told you I was doing a Mel Robbins course right now. She’s like, you really can’t fail this.

Sarah Tacy [00:53:08]:
No matter what, you’re gonna find something out about yourself as long as you take a little bit of action. And if you don’t take that 15 minutes of action, then you find something out about yourself. Like, there’s there’s no failing. And so I loved both of the stories that you told in your book about authenticity and finding your way. And the last question that could be a sentence or 2 maybe would just be about legacy. You speak about legacy quite a bit in your book, and I can hear it woven throughout this conversation. I’m wondering if you could say a phrase or a sentence on what you want your legacy to be.

Andrea [00:53:45]:
Absolutely. And first I want to say thank you for bringing that lion tracking analogy in because that was so good and that, yeah, that just brings home both of those stories in a new way for me, so thank you. And I totally you made such an impression on me that night too when we first met, and I just thought, what? First of all, wow. This is one of the most naturally radiant, lovely, striking, beautiful people I’ve ever met. And, also, I just felt, wow. What a real, honest, like, open person who’s you were going through some shit that day, and you were just, like, very real about it and didn’t try to pretend that, oh, let me just put that in the you know, in my purse while I, you know, just sit here and socialize, but you really were just so so authentic and and so actually embodied. And and I remember thinking because my childhood best friend lives in your town. And when you said where you’re from, I was like, oh, I’m so happy for my friend that there’s cool people like this in her town, and I will have to connect you too at some point.

Andrea [00:54:53]:
So as far as legacy, I think it’s it’s always a work in progress, but it’s really about helping others feel empowered to be fully self expressed. That’s really it. It has to do with I’m especially interested in helping others who have a lot of barriers to that, like women who have a lot of conditioning or socialization that might have made a lot of the barriers internal. But whether internal or external, really removing those barriers and helping everybody live into the fullest version of themselves that they are here to be and their, and the legacy that’s true for them.

Sarah Tacy [00:55:50]:
Thank you. I don’t always remember to do this, but I’m going to see what comes out. A lot of times I end a mini musing and sometimes an interview with a little reticular activation slash universe prayer. May we give ourselves so much grace and may we surround ourselves with others who may be able to point out the small valiant steps that we’ve taken along the way. And when we find ourselves alone, may we have the blessing and the strength to recognize what we’re capable of to make the next right choice with full permission 5, 10, 15 years later to choose differently. May we know that life will be a journey of constantly rechecking our navigation, going off course and getting back on course of the path of not here and the hell yes. May we find our legacy and continue to listen to the whispers to feel for the butterflies in our stomach and to surround ourselves with strong heart centered people. In this moment, I’m also having an image of nature, other earth.

Sarah Tacy [00:57:59]:
I’m thinking of ancestors and the legacies of those who came before us and thinking of the powers seen and unseen and holding those all dear with great gratitude.

Andrea [00:58:16]:
And then

Sarah Tacy [00:58:17]:
I find myself taking an easy inhale because it’s the yoga coming out here. And an exhale. Thank you.

Andrea [00:58:28]:
An honor.

Sarah Tacy [00:58:41]:
Thank you for tuning in. It’s been such a pleasure. If you’re looking for added support, I’m offering a program that’s totally free called 21 days of untapped support. It’s pretty awesome. It’s very easy. It’s very helpful. You can find it at sarahtacey.com. And if you love this episode, please subscribe and like.

Sarah Tacy [00:59:05]:
Apparently, it’s wildly useful. So we could just explore what happens when you scroll down to the bottom. Subscribe, rate, maybe say a thing or 2. If you’re not feeling it, don’t do it. It’s totally fine. I look forward to gathering with you again. Thank you so much.